December 31st

"....everybody is looking for dat smthing...one thing dat makes it all complete, some find it in de strangest places, some find it in face of their children.....some even find it in their lover's eyes...it may even b a simple line dat can make u laugh......;-)"

-Facebook

I've been soul searching for a while now, and though answers fly at me left and right, i'm too dizzy from the constant bustle around me to focus...to breathe. So how am I to achieve my ultimate goal, happiness, while simultaneously tolerating the world's BS? I am a follower of Christ, and many would say that is enough to accomplish everything I'd ever want. But I don't see Creflo Dollar abandoning all of his worldly possessions. No, I'm a realist, not a hypocrite.

What's crazy is that regardless of how hard we as human beings try to deny it, it is our nature to seek a state of comfort. It's called homeostasis, and it reigns over our minds..our bodies...our entire state of being. Even a 'Downer Dan' recieves some kind of personal relief for being grumpy, because his objective is to be grumpy, and achieving that goal=self gratification. Sounds funny, huh? I hope you're following me here. If you're not, I apologize, but this = my blog. ANYWAYS, this 'something' that we are looking for will help us retrieve temporary homeostasis. Notice how I said 'temporary'...

People, believe it or not, are scared as s*** of investment. Investing time, money, or emotions into something that isn't tangible is even harder. Maybe that's one of the main reasons for the ever-growing Atheist trend in America. I know that I have a serious issue with investing into immediate emotional substitutes, like mediocre/skin deep relationships. I used to pride myself on being a good Christian. It was something that made me stand out, and I loved God's word. But it seems like ever since I got to college, I haven't had time for the one thing that made me truly happy.

Homeostasis = survival. And my survival methods are warped